More Election fun

Nearly every general election, we have someone who does something stupid, asks something boneheaded, or gets me irritated. (Ok, the last one is easy to do, I'll admit.)

One time for the Presidential election, we had a reporter come and start walking around asking people who they just voted for. He wasn't trying to be discrete, and he should have been out of earshot of those trying to vote. I approached him, and told him to knock it off. He got upset, showed me his press credentials. He then told me he could ask anyone any question he wanted, wherever he wanted. My response, while folding my arms and dropping the eyebrows was "Oh yeah, you think so, huh?" He wanted to get into it with me, but I didn't let him. He left the school angry. (He could have left the school arrested, really.)

Last year, some dude came in wearing a George Bush mask. People really can be stupid sometimes. (I'll let you go follow the link back to last year's craziness.)

The past couple of elections, there has been this one kid who comes in with his wife, and has to talk in his "so loud it's nearly not talking anymore" voice about an issue on the ballot or what he thinks about one candidate or the other. Last time, I was busy on the other end of the room, and didn't get a chance to stop him before he stopped. I was ready for him this time, I fully planned to go after him about it. (Note to everyone: You shouldn't be discussing the issues or candidates within earshot of those trying to vote. That's illegal.) Anyway, he came in, and was in line, and started talking to the people at the table about how he thought it was ironic that they were voting on Prop 1 in a school. (Prop 1 was about vouchers for private schools.) I started heading his way ready to knock him down a notch or two, he saw me coming, and said "Not that I'm endorsing either side or trying to tell anyone how to vote. I'll shut up now." I'm glad I'm not a football quarterback, I must have telegraphed what I was going to do from a mile away. We'll have to see what happens for the Western States Primary in February. I'll still be ready for him.

At one point while we were busy, some chuckle head came in wanting to know how far away he had to be from the polling place so he could safely do some electioneering. One of the poll workers told him 150 feet, he asked how far that was. The poll worker told him way out at the sidewalk. I had no knowledge of this conversation, but the guy didn't like this answer, and he was pointed my direction. I was busy, and when he said he wanted to do some electioneering, I stopped listening. He asked how far away 150 feet from the building was, I said "I don't know, the sidewalk, I guess." He stood there for a minute while I continued to ignore him, then asked "Are you sure?" I simply said "No", gave him a look, and walked away from him. The guy disappeared, which is probably all for the better. What does he expect us to do, go find a tape measure to figure out exactly the spot where he can start harassing voters? I said the sidewalk because it was way out where he wouldn't be able to bother anyone, and wouldn't even be able to talk to the people parking in the parking lot to come in to vote. I figure he looked like the kind of guy that should be holding up those Little Cesears signs, waving them at the street for minimum wage. I'll keep that picture in my head for the next time I see him. (I've seen him on campus before.) At least he didn't go to the newspaper to tell them that a poll manager kicked him out of the voting place, like the guy with the mask did. If that had happened, I would have happily invited the guy back so I could do it properly.

We had some kid walk in about 7pm that wanted to vote, but wasn't in the register. We sent him over to the provisional ballot desk to do one of those. He didn't have proper ID, so we sent him home to get it. He came back with his lifetime worth of bank statements, cell phone bills, tuition statements, etc. (He looked to be about 19.) He only needed 2 forms for proof of residency, he brought 100. We were busy with normal voters, and the assistant poll manager was busy with a number of provisional voters. The kid kept trying to come over to me to ask about stuff.

• "I made a mistake on this form, can I get a new one?" My response - "Go over to the provisional ballot desk and talk to the lady that was helping you."

• "Do I have to fill out this line?" My response - "Go over to the provisional ballot desk and talk to the lady that was helping you."
  

It took him about a half hour to fill out an envelope that most adults could fill out in 5 minutes. Things like "Name", "Address", that sort of thing. At one point, I heard the normally mild mannered assistant poll manager say "You aren't listening to a word I'm saying. You have to write the reason for voting provisionally in that box there. If you don't put the reason down, I can't give you a ballot.", it wasn't quietly. The guy finally got his ballot, and was ready to vote. He started heading to the electronic voting machine with his paper ballot and pen. I turned him around. He sat at the table to cast his votes, looked up, and said "Do you guys know anything about these people I'm voting for? I don't know any of them or what their positions are." I thought the assistant poll manager was going to lose it, then she started laughing hysterically. The guy had spent about 75 minutes to that point trying to get to the point that we would let him vote, then he was completely unprepared to actually vote. It was amazing. That's not the best part. On his way out, he said "That was fun. I think I will volunteer to do what you guys do. Where can I sign up?" He'll only work in my polling place if I'm not there....